I sent the requesting admin from Kbin.earth screenshots and example thread links in DM, and with his or her permission, am sharing the most relevant part of the exchange here for the devs /admins:

Maeve
Compare: https://kbin.earth/m/comradeship@lemmygrad.ml vs https://lemmygrad.ml/

1 week ago
blued_gear
I will take a closer look at the issue once I’m back from vacation. What I found in the server logs 'til yet was not very conclusive, except some errors coming from the Lemmy side (but I can’t say if they are the real reason).

@dessalines@lemmy.ml

    • Maybe, but it seems somewhat specific to kbin.earth to me. The error logs blued_gear saw might help the right people understand the issue too and dig in further if there’s something that needs fixing either in mbin or lemmy.

      The one other mbin instance using 1.10.1 that federates with grad doesn’t have the same issue with the same users at least:

      • Maeve@kbin.earthOP
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        15 hours ago

        Okay, I thought at first it was kbin.social specific, until I corresponded with that admin., thank you for digging into that and confirming my original thought. I have other thoughts that I will reserve, for the moment.

        • Best of luck - I hope you’re able to help people get to the bottom of what’s going wrong.

          Unfortunately, my experiences with reporting federation problems in the past has often been that it’s hard for me to get the right info to the right people.

          • Maeve@kbin.earthOP
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            15 hours ago

            I hear you. I’m not sure where kbin admins are, but I think it’s hosted in Germany. I don’t know if time zones are a factor, since I have no idea where .ml is hosted or where admins reside, for either instance. @blued_gear

            • I would guess that the ml admins / lemmy devs haven’t seen this post (tags in post bodies don’t notify) and that even if they did, at minimum they’d need the logs for:

              some errors coming from the Lemmy side

              To have any hope of saying why it’s not working properly (assuming the errors are related to the federation issues), but that ultimately the mbin devs would probably be in a better position to interpret those logs.

              E: ah, I see that blued_gear is an mbin dev from their profile.

              • Maeve@kbin.earthOP
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                5 hours ago

                Well I posted about it on kbin mag so maybe it will get sorted. I wasn’t aware devs wouldn’t be pinged, but I’ll wait a bit and see if Kbin/mbin devs can sort it. They’ve been pretty good at addressing issues, so far.